DO YOU WANT TO “CUSS” OR DISCUSS? ENGAGING IN CONVERSATION
Fred C. Windisch
One of the advantages of working for a large corporation is being able to participate in its investment in developing people and people skills. My employer has demonstrated its commitment to people by allowing me to learn about engagement.
A simple definition of engagement is the use of steps and tools to get your point understood by the other person. The process may be referred to as a model or a procedure. The primary goal is to focus on the outcome and obtain that outcome with a minimum of distress.
ENGAGEMENT TOOLS
The following engagement tools help us to understand a standard operating model.
Dialogue. This key word is defined as a special type of inquiry that discovers insight to improve results. When only one states his opinion or desires, it is a one-sided conversation. Dialogue allows for genuine discussion and continuous feedback. If John were trying to convince Joe that nozzle #1 is better than nozzle #2, for example, he would first have to solicit feedback from Joe to understand his opinion about nozzle #2. He cannot just state that nozzle #1 is better; he has to address each of Joe`s issues. He would have to engage in “strategic dialogue.”
Here are some steps that can help you to understand strategic dialogue:
Listen carefully as each person shares his responses.
Remember that dialogue is about listening for deeper understanding and insight.
Be aware that it is a challenge to listen fully without jumping in with your own reaction.
Notice when you feel uncomfortable or disagree; it could be a sign that you are bumping up against your own assumptions.
EVOLUTION OF NEW MANAGEMENT STYLE
Several years ago, management styles were direct and authoritative. A deep-voiced manager could “demand” that things be accomplished. Since then, employees have become more educated and have developed an interest in achievements instead of putting the square peg in the square hole. Today`s members want to do well. That`s why they joined in the first place, and they want to be part of the operation, not just a pair of hands. A huge challenge today is to ensure that we have in place systems that demonstrate support and appreciation for our organization members. Once they de-velop ownership in the organization, they naturally be-come more interested and perform at a higher level.
The engagement process enables us to address our members` different methods of communicating. The most important consideration here is that we commit to sincere, quality communication. Inherent in the engagement process are the following elements: Advocacy, Inquiry, the Ladder of Inference, and the Left-Hand Column.
Advocacy
Advocacy refers to presenting what you want and why you want it. We should be stating: “Here is my view, and here is how I arrived at it.” In many, cases, we say only, “Here is my view.” The basic reason for doing this is that we normally consider our opinion as the only opinion. That is not wrong or “evil,” but it certainly leaves little room for constructive communications, team participation, and gathering all of the participants` good ideas. We alienate the other party at the onset of the discussion if we do not include others in the discovery aspect of all our input/data. We might use “inviting”-type statements such as, “Here`s what I think” and “Here`s how I got there” or “I assumed that” or “I came to this conclusion because ….” These statements encourage others to state their opinions.
Inquiry
Inquiry involves questioning the presenter and using good listening skills. A good reminder is that we have two ears and one mouth, which means that we should listen twice as much as we speak, especially in active communications.
Continual inquiry allows us to understand each issue. Inquiry is not interrogating. It is skillful questioning based only on items that have not been understood. Key questions/ comments might be
What leads you to conclude that?
What data do you have to support your position?
What is the significance of that?
I`m asking you about your assumptions because ….
Am I correct that you are saying … (repeat what you understood was said)?
Balancing Advocacy and Inquiry
Balancing Advocacy and Inquiry is one way for members to begin changing the way an organization works. Is your organization run by “direction,” mandates, and approvals? High-value communications can minimize these top-down attitudes, improve teamwork, and build better relationships and a reputation for integrity. Members will learn the skills of balancing. When teams stumble on a difficult point, a good leader can use these skills to extract information and encourage participation.
The Ladder of Inference
Here, imagination comes into play. The Ladder of Inference entails the following steps: Take action, adopt beliefs, draw conclusions, make assumptions, add meaning, select data, and employ observable data and experiences.
Our personal beliefs are based on conclusions from our observations and experience. Some of these beliefs are as follows:
Our beliefs are the truth.
The truth is obvious.
Our beliefs are based on real data.
The data we select are the real truth.
Scenario
Let`s consider the following scenario as an example of how the Ladder of Inference and use of imagination can affect outcome.
Yesterday`s Management Style
The chief believes that four-inch supply line is best for the department because of cost, ease of repacking, and the fact that most of the fires are small and require a minimal water supply. During budget discussions, the chief advocates the purchase of four-inch hose to replace older hose.
He notices that Joe is just sitting there, staring into space and generally wasting his and the chief`s time. Joe is a high-performance member. He does everything right and is respected by his peers.
Joe is thinking: “I`ll let the chief do his thing; it doesn`t matter. What the heck; he just doesn`t care about me.”
Under the old method of management, the department would have purchased the four-inch hose.
Today`s Management Style
A contemporary, astute leader involved in this scenario, however, notices Joe`s body language and moves toward inquiry. He asks Joe for his opinion and continues to ask questions.
Once the leader begins to listen, and listens well, the team starts to recognize that Joe believes five-inch hose is the way to go–more water when we need it (the element of advocacy). Joe`s reasoning is as follows: “Is packing hose an issue to worry over? Also, it can be proven that the cost of the five-inch hose is more effective when considering that it provides the means to move more water when it is needed.”
Following the Ladder of Inference for the four-inch-hose proposal, we see the following:
Observable data from only one side was used.
No quality meanings were displayed.
Assumptions were made concerning the amount of water for most applications.
The conclusion was drawn to purchase the four-inch hose.
The chief`s beliefs were used.
The action would have been to purchase the four-inch hose.
By eliminating the chief`s personal beliefs and opening the discussion to others, the five-inch hose was purchased.
So many times, we let our personal beliefs override our good sense, and we make low-quality decisions. Use the Ladder of Inference as a tool; use every step of the ladder to advocate and inquire. The team will become vibrant, and better decisions will be made. The net impact will be that your members will become more involved in your organization`s decision-making processes. We have all heard the adage that two heads are better than one. Clearly, many heads can make better, higher-quality decisions.
The Left-Hand Column
The Left-Hand Column refers to what you are secretly thinking and the thoughts that are never shared. Using the four-inch-hose example, the chief may have been thinking that Joe was not a team player. If we allow the Left-Hand Column to be exposed, we risk alienating other people and the withholding of their ideas. The results will be dissent and argumentative communications–just the opposite of what we are trying to achieve. The chief/ manager must at least restrict his Left-Hand Column beliefs, not reveal them at all, or modify and soften them so that others can address the beliefs. This latter choice takes a lot of courage on the leader`s part, for it opens him up to challenges to his beliefs and opinions. Five horns should not get in the way of quality communications.
Use your Left-Hand Column as a resource. Keep in mind that although your personal beliefs may be based on data and experience, they still can be flawed or steeped in tradition. One way to determine whether that is the case is to ask yourself the following questions:
What has really led me to think and feel this way?
What was my intention? What was I really trying to accomplish?
Did we really achieve the results we wanted?
What assumptions am I making about another person or idea?
What prevented me from acting differently?
How can I use my Left-Hand Column as a resource to improve communications?
Using the Engagement tools will improve the quality and efficiency of communications. The question remains, Do you want to “cuss” or discuss?
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References
”Teaching Smart People How to Learn,” Chris Argyris, Harvard Business Review, 1991.
The Engagement Process, Ross Partners and Shell Oil Company, 1997.
The Fifth Discipline Fieldbook. Peter Senge, Richard Ross, Bryan Smith, Charlotte Roberts, and Art Kleiner (New York: Doubleday, 1994).
FRED C. WINDISCH is the chief of the Ponderosa Volunteer Fire Department near Houston, Texas. He has served as chairman of the Volunteer Chief Officers Section (VCOS) of the International Association of Fire Chiefs (IAFC) and is now serving as the VCOS representative to the IAFC Board of Directors. Windisch is a 30-year employee of Shell Oil Company`s Westhollow Technology Center, working in health and safety.
